Church starts in the morning, in a few hours. I’m not sure if we will be going or not– our motivations are no longer to please a god we don’t believe in or to feel righteous or even for fellowship as we are on such different pages from our church family now. We still feel a bit obligated to go for our friends’ sake who don’t know we are unbelievers– gah.
But, there is something in me that still pulls on me to go, for me. Having spent nearly every single Sunday morning of my entire life in a church service, it feels surreal to just sleep in and chill out. It feels like I’m robbing my Sunday of it’s meaning and duplicating Saturday one too many times. I need Sundays to still mean something. A celebration of life? A weekly hike? Reading some sort of… um, science book together?? A BBQ with friends? Listening to Vivaldi or Rachmaninoff or Beethoven or Liszt? I need some sort of tradition our family can start together that I can cling to and look forward to like I used to look forward to church.
How can an atheist have sacred space? Is it gone forever from my life?